Some Thoughts on Marriage

When signing papers for our new house last night, I realized that Michael and I just past a miletsone (albeit a small one) 18 months of marriage!

This morning, I began to think about what I have learned during my time being married, particularly the past three months that Michael and I have spent apart, and the over-arching theme in all that I've learned is that God is not just sufficient for every need and desire, he is MORE than enough.

Most of us are familiar with the metaphor used when describing salvation, that we all have a void that only God can fill. There is so much truth to that statement! However, somewhere after our salvation, we begin to rely less on God for our needs and more on others and ourselves. We become work-aholics so we can be successful and make enough money to buy things we "need." We rely on our parents for advice and direction. When we get married, we rely on our spouse for support, protection, encouragement, the list goes on and on.

Its funny becuase we feel so completed when we find the "right" person. But here is where my thoughts have changed. Since I have spent so much time alone the past three months, I haven't been able to rely on my husband to fulfills needs I have as his wife, not becuase he wasn't trying, but because distance makes things SO har. At first I felt so empty and lonely. But what God has been teaching me is that I was never created with a void that only Michael can fill. I was created with that one void that God can fill, but I try to replace Him. In doing so, I put so much expectation on my husband to fulfill needs that he (on his own) just can't do. That can cause so much stress and strain on a marriage.

What God has shown me is that it is INDEED HE that fulfills every need, and that I am lucky enough that he uses Michael as a tool to do so. I have had no choice or option but to go to the Lord for companionship, peace, support, and encouragement since I haven't been able to be with Michael. And the Lord NEVER fails. It is unfair for me to expect Michael to fulfill needs that were created for God ALONE to fill.

Getting rid of those expectations has deepend my relationship both with Michael and with the Lord. There is so much relief in going to The One who does not fail FIRST.
At our wedding, we had a dear friend read Psalm 139 as a prayer. This is one of my favorite passages in scripture becuase it reveals how intimately involved God is with all his children. And now I know that when I think Michael knows me best on this earth, he does. But its not becuase he can do it on his own, it is becuase of the power of God in him. God knows me intimately and every day he reveals that to me when Michael anticipates my thoughts and moods.

Marriage is so beautiful when Christ is the center and my prayer everday is for all of my friends and family to experience the stability and peace of being fimrly secured to The Rock and Redeemer.
Here is an excerpt from Psalm 139:
1 O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. 5 You hem me in--behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? 8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, 10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. 11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," 12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. 13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, 16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you.